Has neon under-lighting and a low, bouncy suspension (cue the song “Low Rider”). That’s really all the info I need to know that you and I will not be friends. From Grace in Leesburg, VA: If your rear windshield has on it anything like "If it flies, it dies" along with the outline of a gun site, that's all I need to know about you. 3/31/2010
Is the most basic of basic models, yet is tricked out with all the fancy sport-model extras: a spoiler, equalizer, racing stripes, a “bra”, mag wheels and a jacked-up rear end. (Um, why not just spend the money on a better car?)
Is a low rider, hearse, or Hummer. Or worse, a green minivan. (Don't know why, but I inexplicably, irrationally and completely loathe green minivans. Well, all minivans really... But green ones are the devil's spawn of the automotive world.)
Has giant chrome wheels that leave almost no rubber visible on your tires. (Do you have something against tires, or did someone tell you giant chrome wheels are likely to get you laid?)
Has a gun rack and/or confederate flag anywhere on it. ('Nuff said -- especially, but not exclusively, for those living north of the Mason-Dixon line.)
From Ruth in Florence, AL: If you decide to speed away in your car as it's in the process of being repossessed, that's pretty much all I need to know about you. 4/19/2010.
Sports mud flaps with that seated naked lady silhouette. (Do you think this will make people think you're a stud? If so, I've got some this-just-in, not-so-good news for you.)
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